Creating a 'Container' for Meaningful Conversations in Teams

I recently had a conversation with a friend of mine who is also an executive at a large company. We were discussing how a high-level workshop he was attending as a participant, where everybody arrived expecting a fairly straightforward experience, derailed completely and ended up being a terrible experience for all involved. 

In our conversation about this workshop, what very quickly became clear, was that it was not the topic of the workshop that caused the problem, but that it was the behaviour of the individuals towards one another in the workshop that caused a massive conflict and subsequent derailment. When I asked him whether anyone had thought about intentionally setting the workshop up ahead of time so that participants bought into a specific type of psychological environment in which they agreed to behave towards one another in a specific way so that the necessary outcomes could be reached, the answer was a short and simple: no.

I would argue that this is very often the case. We give a lot of thought to what we should be meeting about, but very little to how we should engage in these meetings in support of the topics on the table. And in a world where in the USA alone 11 million meetings are held every single day, with CEO’s on average attending 37 meetings per day, you can quickly see what a missed opportunity it is if we’re not thinking actively and intentionally about the quality of our interactions within the millions of organisational gatherings taking place around the world every single day.

And so that got me thinking about container creation.

 

Wait, what does ‘container creation’ mean?

In the facilitation world, the term ‘to create a container’ refers to the intentional establishment of a supportive and safe environment for individuals or groups to engage in conversation, learning, growth and collaboration. This concept draws inspiration from the idea that a container holds and shapes the space within it. When facilitators, leaders, or even just parties to a conversation therefore create a container intentionally, they are essentially setting the stage for meaningful interactions to occur.

My experience shows that setting ground rules for once-off organisational events is common practice. When we attend a workshop, we arrive expecting the facilitator to ask us to commit to some ground rules, like showing up on time, or not being on our devices. Often these rules seem slightly out of the ordinary, and limited to the experience of this specific engagement. Mostly they focus on the ‘above the surface’ behaviour we’d like to see (like staying off your phone in a workshop), and not on the unique underlying behaviour that, if present in this specific conversation, could enable a container that supports the success of the conversation.

But, we don’t just need container creation in rare or once-off organisational workshops or meetings where we have the luxury of a facilitator. Where the real need for container creation is, is in the habitual, recurring conversations or meetings we have in our teams or organisations. It is in these conversations, that we become used to behaving a certain way, and blind to the impact these behaviours have on the success of our conversations.

At best, when our individual or collective behaviours during a conversation no longer serve the purpose or outcome of the meeting, we leave feeling slightly dissatisfied or frustrated, but find another way to get things done. At worst, we leave feeling othered, excluded and unheard. We leave being worse off in our relationship(s) with the people in the conversation, as a result of these unhelpful behaviours, than before. And so, the very vehicle that actually serves to connect us - conversations - now pushes us away from one another.

What would happen if you could ensure just the right set of circumstances, and behaviours by everyone involved in the way the conversation is had? A set of circumstances and behaviours that ensure that even the toughest topic can be raised and discussed, because everyone in the conversation is committed to these behaviours and practices. 

What if the participants to the conversation understood that it is not just the behaviour itself that is important in the conversation, but also understood that the behaviour represents a value that is needed in this conversation to ensure that the underlying concerns of all the participants are met, not just in what is discussed, but also in how it is being discussed

 

Let’s look at an example.

Team X, an executive management team of a large corporate, is coming together for a rare team development session, facilitated in-house by the HR department. During this workshop, the team will be working with a popular personality profiling tool, but the real purpose of the workshop is to get buy-in from this management team for a broader, overall roll-out of the tool in the organisation by the HR department.

This team is new to development sessions, and while senior in the organisation, they are not mature in their approach to people development. They meet regularly as a management body, and therefore have some deeply entrenched behaviours towards one another, especially during meetings. Some of these behaviours include unfocussed conversations, inappropriate humour, engrained hierarchy and inequality, and a lack of vulnerability.

Here are some elements we’d take into account as we explore ways to create a container for this team.

Let’s start with the distinction between the topic and the purpose of the workshop. While the topic is simply about showcasing a personality profiling tool to this team, the true underlying purpose is not just for the executives to be introduced to this tool, but actually for them to buy into the tool itself to such an extent that they give their cooperation and support in the roll-out to the rest of the organisation. What they are after is the building of trust. 

You can see how this purpose steers us into the direction of what type of container to create.

In order for them to give their support to this tool, it is important that they see the value of it, have a full experience of it, and see for themselves how it benefits them as individuals and as a team. That means that they need to feel safe enough to experiment with this profiling tool, be willing to share pieces of content from their confidential individual reports (some of which may be uncomfortable to share), and be open to listen without interruption to the diversity of the views in the room.

Concretely therefore in the workshop, you’d want to see a focussed, but open discussion about the tool, and enough psychological safety for each of the executives profiles to be revealed. For this team, where inappropriate humour often rears its head, you’d want to see a more serious atmosphere, where sharing is encouraged. You’d also want to see every member of the team being fully present, despite their exceptionally full calendars. It is important that the team demonstrates an openness to listen without interruption, and a willingness to self-reflect.

 

But, why are these specific behaviours important? 

Because what you want to cultivate in an emotionally less-mature team, is the underlying value of demonstrating vulnerability as a way to build trust between each other and in the tool itself.

In support of creating this type of container, the facilitator would preferably not be someone in the HR team, but someone external who is able to maintain a degree of neutrality, and the venue of the workshop should be outside of the office to further encourage a different way of behaving towards one another.

So, back to you reading this article. Designing containers is not a simple task, but it is an exceptionally rewarding one, and a sure way to transform your organisational gatherings. We’d like to share with you 4 considerations to think about as you design intentional containers for your most important meetings, engagements and gatherings.

 

4 Considerations for Designing Intentional Containers for your Gatherings

  1. Physical Environment

    Creating a container starts with choosing and designing a physical space that is conducive to the purpose of the gathering (and that is sometimes outside the office!). It could also involve arranging seating in a circle (instead of around the boardroom table), providing comfortable furniture, ensuring adequate lighting and fresh air, and picking a venue or place that shows to the people in the conversation that you care about what matters to them.

  2. Emotional Safety

    Building trust and psychological safety is paramount in creating a container. Participants should feel comfortable expressing themselves, sharing ideas, and taking risks without fear of judgement or negative repercussions. Here you want to actively think about how to get buy-in from the group for a set of behaviours or values that they would like to practically be for one another during the conversation.

  3. Purpose

    The true purpose of your gathering determines the type of container required. A meeting to repair trust will require a different container to a workshop on innovation. Spend time engaging with all the stakeholders involved, and make sure you understand why this event is really taking place. Remember, the topic of a meeting is not the same as its purpose, and it’s only when you uncover the true purpose that you’ll be able to understand what emotional safety for that purpose means. 

  4. Supportive Facilitation

    Skilled facilitation is vital to maintaining the container. Facilitators - whether in-house or external - guide the flow of conversation, manage conflicts, encourage diverse perspectives, and create opportunities for reflection and synthesis. They hold the space for exploration and growth, ensuring that the container remains inclusive and focused on the intended outcomes. Your job is to figure out what conversations require external facilitation, and if an internal facilitator would do, how you might capacitate a group of in-house individuals to fulfil this function.